I’ve been thinking about Nick a lot lately… it’s usually little things or random stuff.  Like the announcement of the Wii U for example.  As excited as I am for a new Nintendo console, I can’t help but think that Nick would have been downright giddy about it, too.

And then I saw this article about Alice Pyne.  I’m not going to summarize it – just read it.  And read her blog, too.  I couldn’t get through it without crying, and I’m guessing you’ll have a similar reaction.  It’s heart-breaking, but also amazingly uplifting and inspiring to see how much support she’s getting, both from strangers online and from her family.

Sometimes it seems easier to focus on the sad stuff, but when I read a story like Alice’s, or think back on how optimistic and positive Nick always was, it’s a great reminder that there’s plenty of positive stuff that comes out of hard times, too.

Anyway, here’s a quick recap of things we all learned at the 2010 HOHHR BYOB BBQ:

• Eli and the Capobianco family get along GREAT
• Nate has gotten big, and he looks more and more like his Dad every time I see him
• Sausage and peppers can still be good even if the sausage is slightly charred (my bad!)
• Ladder ball should not be played in the vicinity of low-hanging wires
• Sherlock can impressively get his entire body under the shed and back out again, though he still can’t catch a rabbit

In all seriousness, Courtney, Eli, Sherlock and I were all extremely grateful that everyone could come over – it was great seeing the gang and catching up.  It’s funny that at last year’s get-together, there were no babies, and this year there were two.  Next year there will be three (if anyone wants to up that number, there’s still time!)  I don’t want to get overly philosophical about the circle of life or anything, I’m just saying that babies make everything better (what, me biased?), and I think they make these annual get-togethers that much more fun for everyone.

Looking forward to next year’s BBQ – we just might still have enough burgers and hot dogs to cover it!

Yesterday, Courtney and I joined the National Marrow Registry. In a nutshell, this registry is a database that can help people in need of a bone marrow transplant find a match. Not surprisingly, I was inspired to do this by Nick’s memory, and in all honesty, I should have done it a long time ago.

First off, signing up is insanely quick and easy. We had to fill out some paperwork, and then you swab your cheek four times. That’s it! They don’t even take any blood. We were in and out in 15 minutes.

If you do end up being a match for someone who needs marrow, then the donation is a bit more involved than just donating blood, but it is a lot simpler and safer than many people think. (For more, click here.)

Nick ended up getting a marrow transplant from his sister, and in some cases a transplant will come from a close relative, and that will be that.  But there are people out there who doesn’t have a sibling or family member who can give them the marrow they need, and even though that person might be a stranger to you, they have family and friends who love them and would be eternally grateful to anyone who can help them.  Walking out of the drive yesterday, I was really angry with myself for not signing up years ago, when I first found out that Nick needed a transplant.  I guess I didn’t because I knew his sister would be a match for him.  But that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have signed up.  Maybe I could have helped someone else who was going through what Nick went through.  While I’m not happy that it took me so long, I am glad I signed up, and as my penance for not doing it earlier, I am urging everyone reading this to learn more about the process at www.marrow.org, and, if you meet the eligibility requirements, to sign up.  It sounds cliché, but it literally could save someone’s life.

I just thought that should be mentioned.

I love you and miss you, Nick.

The first annual Nick’s Marathon event is officially over, and I am calling the weekend a rousing success.  Things didn’t go exactly as planned – we ended up beating only two games throughout the event (I don’t remember Contra 3 being so impossible!) – but a good time was had by all, and we raised over $2500 (so far) for three great charities. I ate a lot of pizza, cookies, peeps, and popems – the four main food groups – and drank a lot of light beer and diet soda, which sort of balances out the junk food.  James and I got a little bit more sleep than we anticipated, but even between naps we surprised ourselves with our second, third, fourth, and fifth winds.  After going to bed early last night, I’m not nearly as wiped as I thought I’d be today.

There were some technical glitches, and we should have hammered out a firmer schedule with people lined up to play specific games so that sleep was more of a part of the calendar, but those are things that can be fixed for next year.  Yes, we’re thinking of making this a yearly thing, so get used to me hitting everyone up for donations on a regular basis.  As James put it, we were able to raise so much money for good causes and have fun doing it – how can we NOT do it again?

Forgive me but I feel the need to go all “awards show” for a minute and thank a few specific people who made the weekend extra special:

First, I have to say thank you to Courtney.  Seriously, there aren’t many wives who would be willing to not only stand by while their husband decides to play video games for an entire weekend, but who would also support the gesture every step of the way.  Courtney went above and beyond by cooking food for us, going on bagel runs,  and even taking the controller a few times.  I’m one hell of a lucky guy.

Dominic Monfre, thanks for designing the t-shirts; they really and truly came out absolutely amazing.  For anyone who is waiting for their shirt, fear not, they will all get sent out in due time.

Aaron Neuman and Andy Manoff, thank you guys for coming by for nice long gaming stretches Saturday afternoon and the Saturday night/Sunday morning respectively.   Seriously, I really needed the sleep break, and you guys pitching in for long hauls made a huge difference there.

Kari Thompson, thank you for the super delicious and thoughtful homemade treats you sent over.  Kari made Zelda-specific lemon triangles, and River City Ransom-specific chocolate chip cookies, both of which were delicious.  And the card that was included with the goodies was also incredibly sweet.

James Brief, thanks for all of the technical work you did on making this thing happen.  Setting up the website, getting the video stream going, fixing the countless audio problems, and allowing us to turn your apartment into a nerd paradise for a weekend was a lot, and you were happy to do it all.

And of course, thanks to everyone who donated!

I know that somewhere Nick was smiling down on us, even if he was a little embarrassed about how terrible we were playing video games in his name.  More than once it occurred to me that if he was playing with us, we would have torn through many more games in far less time, as he was a much better gamer than any of the rest of us.   But we ended the marathon by finally beating Donkey Kong Country 2, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV, and then playing a little multiplayer Super Bomberman.  That’s not a co-op game, but its one that I’ll always associate with playing at Nick’s house for hours on end.  In the end, I think it’s safe to say that good times were had by all, and I think we were able to give a great friend a nice tribute.

As many of you know, every year myself, James, and Mehler combine our birthdays into one big triple birthday extravaganza. This year, we’re throwing something else into the mix: a fund raising event we’re calling Nick’s Marathon. In honor of Nicholas Capobianco, who passed away earlier this year memory, we’re going to raise money for The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society, The Ronald McDonald House, and Child’s Play in Nick’s name.  And we’re going to do it in a way Nick himself would have loved: by playing video games all weekend.  And for good measure, we’ll be broadcasting the whole thing live on the web, at  www.nicksmarathon.com.

We’re going to be playing multiplayer co-op games, because those are the kinds of games we always used to play at Nick’s house back in Middle School and High School, and because it’s always more fun to beat a game playing on the same team as your buddy.

If you want to help our cause, please go to nicksmarathon.com and make a donation.  Or you can help us spread the word by forwarding on what we’re doing to other people.  Or you can join our Facebook group.  Or you can come by James’ apartment on the weekend of October 24 – 26, hang out, play some video games, and eat some junk food.

Or you can just show up on Friday night, October 24th and help us celebrate another triple birthday.

Anyway, here it is.

I want to thank everyone who passed along their support after reading Friday’s post. I know it was a far cry from my usual theorizing about Lost and pondering the details of Nintendo games, but all of the kind words that were passed along really meant a lot. Its been tough these past few days, but I’ve learned a lot about the importance of friends and family and the ways that we comfort each other in times of great loss.

Tomorrow, I’m going to continue with more posts about silly things that I obsess over like TV shows and video games and movies, in part because it will be a nice distraction for me, but more importantly because Nick would have wanted me to carry on with all off my geeky passions.

For anyone interested, Nick’s mother suggested that donations can be made in Nick’s name to The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society.

Last night, my friend Nicholas Capobianco passed away.

He was less than a month away from his 29th birthday.

Nick beat leukemia twice – once when he was a child, and again when it came back from remission a few years ago. The second time, he needed a bone marrow transplant, which left his immune system weak. Though he was fine for over a year, a few weeks ago he caught pneumonia, which caused irreversible damage to his lungs.

Nick loved the net – he even had a laptop with wi-fi access in his hospital room – so a tribute on the web seems appropriate.

Nick was the best friend a guy could ever ask for. I realize that after most people pass away, they are probably remembered as the best friend/spouse/parent/etc. there ever was. But I stand by my statement. Nick was so selfless, caring, and thoughtful, and he would always be there for any of his friends, without question. His dedication to those he loved put him in a league all his own.

Everyone who knew Nick loved him – what was there not to like? He was shy but always friendly, and probably the most easy-going person I’ve ever met. In the decade plus that I knew him, I can’t remember a single instance of the guy losing his temper, and that’s one hell of an impressive feat. When some jerk tried to steal his soda at Roy Rogers, he just laughed it off. During a grueling track practice while the rest of us were whining, he would just run his hardest without a complaint. The constant teasing that guy friends do to each other, the kind that every once in a while can lead to a blow out, it never got to Nick. He always saw the lighter side of things, and life to Nick was just a string of good times with his friends and his family.

I don’t know if he was so mellow because of his health battles or in spite of them, but I can’t imagine anyone else taking on so much bad news with such an optimistic attitude. I know that personally, I wouldn’t have had 1% of the courage that Nick had. His mom told me that before Nick lost consciousness, he gave a thumbs-up and said “No problem,” certain that everything would be better soon. Those final words perfectly epitomize a man who always had hope and never gave up.

I keep asking myself why this would happen; how the nicest person I’ve ever known could be made to suffer so much, and be taken so young. It makes me angry, furious even, but I have to think that the world was extremely blessed to have Nick around for as long as we did. And hey, if Nick himself was able to keep such an optimistic point of view right to the end, what right do I have to be mad?

Nick, you haven’t even been gone a day and already I miss you more than I can put into words. I know that you went peacefully, and I hope that you realize how much you meant to all your friends and family. I hope Heaven has all the video games you could ever want, lightening fast internet access, and plenty of Jillian’s games for you to win infinity tickets at. I know you’ll watch over all of us, but don’t worry too much about us down here – your memory will always keep us strong, and your spirit will always be an inspiration.