Yup - it’s a toaster that burns the image of Darth freakin Vader onto your toast. Quite frankly, I can’t imagine how I ever eat toast that DIDN’T have Darth Vader’s imposing visage on it, now that I know it’s a real option.

From the official product description:
If there’s something every Sith Lord knows how to do it’s make a balanced breakfast! While the Jedi have to live off of Jawa juice and fried nerfsteak, the Dark Lord of the Sith prefers to have a reminder of his fiery Mustafar defeat at his breakfast table. Every morning he burns that moment into a slice of bread with the Darth Vader Toaster. This black, ominous kitchen appliance easily leaves the mark of Vader’s helmet in every yummy piece of toast. Slather some Bantha butter on top, or make two pieces for an extra-Sithy BLT. Force power not required to operate toaster.

These guys are the greatest marketing geniuses since KISS.

On a more serious note, I *am* thinking about asking the Blackberry Storm as a gift option, to kind of curb my iPhone envy. They’ve gotten mixed reviews - anyone out there have one or know someone who has one?

If not, feel free to buy me my coveted Darth Vader toaster here.

As many of you know I have been hard at work for the past several months a new show called Brink. Well, it premieres this Friday night at 10pm on the Science Channel, and will be repeating on the weekend. The show delivers interesting science stories in a really fun and approachable way - think The Daily Show minus the politics and with a bunch of sciency goodness.

Check it out, tell your friends, and click here for more information.

And Happy Thanksgiving!

On to my other shows:

I know it has become rather vogue to rag on Heroes, but I have to jump on this fanboy bandwagon here. Seriously, what is up with this show lately? In Season One, the revelation that Claire was a Petrelli was shocking. Now Sylar is a Petrelli, too? Come on. And then there are more sisters that look just like Niki Sanders? Ugh. Niki was a terrible character in the first two seasons, and though they made a wise move in killing her off, the show runners should have let the actress go altogether. No offense to Ali Larter, but none of these sisters have added anything worthwhile to the plots, and Claire is better eye-candy anyway. And the whole time-traveling plot device has become moronic – Hiro sees a bad future, and doesn’t understand what’s happening, why doesn’t he go to a few days before the world ends and do some digging? Future Peter decides that Nathan’s revealing the Heroes is a bad move so he goes back in time to shoot him. Why not go back an hour before that and talk to his brother? And after F.P. figures out that shooting Nathan was a bad idea, why not go back again and stop himself? In The Eclipse Part 1, Noah rushes a lightly injured Claire out of the house, but doesn’t finish off Sylar and Elle. Why not? Sure he’s worried about his daughter, but how long does it take to shoot some suddenly powerless villains? There are way too many plot holes like these, and it’s just getting infuriating. I appreciate that the plots are moving faster, but sometimes it feels like they are moving too damn fast, and the stories aren’t given a moment to breathe. The flashback episode, like the season’s theme of finding a hero in every villain and a villain in every hero, is so full of potential, but the show has completely squandered every chance for greatness.

Now, on to my love-hate relationship with Smallville. Despite the incredibly noticeable absence of Lex, the show has been doing all right this year, looking like they are finally ready to have Clark accept and embrace his destiny as Superman. But then I have to go and read that the CW is looking to keep the show around for yet another season. Oh dear Lord, why? Well, the reason why is that Smallville’s numbers are still respectable, so they might as well keep trying to get blood from the stone. The problem with the show going on forever is that the very concept of the show was set up to establish Clark’s journey from a boy with superpowers to a man who is to be the world’s greatest superhero. And it’s a great concept for a show, but it needs to have a set end. By allowing the show to drag on for year after year, the series is basically making the character of Clark Kent less and less likeable because he just keeps putting off the inevitable. The show worked very well in the high school years, and even into Season Five, but after that point, Clark has been dragging his feet, and it hurts the overall tone of the show. This season, the Lois and Clark romance feels incredibly rushed to me, and there are so many nitpicky things that drive me crazy week after week. Like, for example, the fact that Chloe was given away at her wedding by Clark and not her father. Where the hell was he? And Martha couldn’t have taken a moment out of her schedule to attend the wedding at her family farm? What? All that said, I was glad they (finally) tied up the Kara storyline, and I have enjoyed the way the show has introduced Doomsday as a real badass with some frightening Kryptonian heritage.

Eli Stone has been great so far this year, and I am terribly bummed that the show will likely not live past halfway through this season. This is a really entertaining show that enough people just haven’t caught on to yet, which is a real shame. The musical numbers are fun, the characters are well-written, and the hot chick from Species is in the show. Why wouldn’t you watch it? With it’s themes of a higher-power making a guy set things right, the show has a very Quantum Leap feel, which is probably one of the reasons I like it. Hopefully ABC will give the show another chance.

The Office is back with a vengeance, which isn’t particularly surprising, but they continue to set the bar very high for themselves. Of course I loved the episode where Dwight mocked Andy by applying to Cornell, since it was chock full of references to my beloved alma mater, and the show has continued to handle the Jim and Pam storyline masterfully, and they remain one of the best couples to watch on TV. The Andy and Angela arc is still great, and the moment when Andy drunk dials his fiancée while Oscar watches was fantastic. Repairing Ryan and Kelly has reminded me how much I had watching them together, and I am convinced that for the series finale, whenever that may be, Michael and Holly will be reunited.

30 Rock has also been on a roll this season. I will admit to being one of the nerds who grumbled about all of the big name guest stars the show was bringing in, as it seemed like a ratings ploy. But the writing is so good, it doesn’t matter what star is playing the zany characters the show brings in, because it always works. And hell, I hope they do get more viewers with their special celebrity appearances, although Tina Fey’s Sarah Palin impression likely had much more to do with the ratings spike than an appearance by Megan Mullalley. My only complaint with the show was the way they abandoned the cliffhangers from last season’s finale. I know the Kenneth in China thing was a joke, but Jack being stuck in D.C. got a mention of how he was able to get out, and I would have liked a similar nod to the Page. But it’s a small quibble for a great show.

On the animated front, I am greatly enjoying The Simpsons and American Dad this year, while Family Guy just feels stale. The Clone Wars is great, even though the Jar Jar episode was, well, a Jar Jar episode. Robot Chicken’s second Star Wars parody was, like the first one, spot on with it’s great reimaginings, and I love the ultra-fast jokes for the super obsessed, like Lando commenting that he loves Boba Fett’s ship, but that he isn’t so crazy about the name. Brilliant. South Park had an amazing second half, and even though I thought the High School Musical and vampire kids episodes weren’t hysterical, they still had enough funny moments to make me happy. And the guinea pigs in their little outfits were simultaneously brilliant and adorable.

And a few other thoughts/news items:

The Girls Next Door remains a guilty pleasure, but the show has lost a little bit of its believability now that Hef has shed two-thirds of his girlfriend group. Eh, I always liked Bridget the best anyway, and I’m curious to meet these new twins.

And yay, Scrubs comes back on the air on January 6!

And could it really be that an Arrested Development movie is actually going to happen?

It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these, and there are a lot of TV shows to catch up on, so I’m making this a two-parter.

First up since it is fresh in my mind: Jack is back! Last night’s 24 mini-movie totally got me excited for Jack Bauer and 24’s return to TV this fall. The real-time action! The political intrigue! Jack taking out bad guy after bad guy after bad guy before they have any idea what’s coming at them! Yeah, last season was a let down, but I’m not ready to write off this show yet. Seeing Jack in Africa (instead of LA for the first time ever) was a nice change of pace, and having him run around D.C. should bring some fresh changes to the show. As for Redemption specifically, I thought it was enjoyable, although the boy soldiers thing did feel very reminiscent of Blood Diamond. And I didn’t totally get why Jack needs “redemption” - he’s saved the free world several times already. But the action was good, Jack yelled “Dammit!” a lot - everything was there. Oh - and one season seven prediction: Tony Almeida isn’t really a bad guy. He’s actually a good guy working inside the terrorist organization to take it down from the inside. I have to believe that - I just don’t accept that Tony would turn rogue.

True Blood ended up being one of my favorite new shows of the season. It got off to a rocky start, but once it found its footing, the show really started to work. The cliffhangers kept the show moving, they weren’t afraid to kill off characters, and none of the supernatural elements felt hokey. My only complaint with the tail end of the season was that the last 15-20 minutes of the finale felt like it was all set-up for season two. But hey, it worked, because I’m looking forward to it.

My other favorite new show has been Fringe. It feels like a cross between Lost and The X-Files - it was supposed to - but the format works. The acting is great and the stories are fun - I really hope the show can keep up its pace.

Meanwhile, Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles has been really, really bad. I almost lost it last week when a human villain from the future showed up in the present, and Derek and his girlfriend killed him, but let the present version of the guy go, because he wasn’t yet that monster, and hopefully he wouldn’t become him. Hopefully? What? Is that how this show works now? Why do they bother protecting John then? Hopefully he’ll survive and defeat the machines and everything will turn up rosy. This may be one nitpicky point, but it is representative of the huge errors in logic this show has been making this season, and it’s getting to be too much.

All right, that’s it for now - more to come tomorrow!

ESPN is reporting that Aaron Heilman is demanding (demanding?) to be either moved from the bullpen to a starter position or be traded.

As shocking as that demand is in and of itself, the story then takes an even worse turn: The Mets are debating what to do.

Please, allow me:

TRADE HIM!

This guy wants to start games for us? Does he understand that starters usually pitch more innings, which if your name is Aaron Heilman, just means that he will have more opportunities to give up tons and tons of runs. Why on Earth would Heilman, the Mets, or anyone want that? Well, I guess it would be good news for the opposing teams…

His agent is making the case that Heilman has had more success as a starter, and so he is justified in wanting out of the bullpen. But look at the numbers quoted in the article: as a starter from 2003 to 2005, he went 5-13 with a 5.93 ERA. Yikes. Last season, he finished 3-8 with a 5.21 ERA. As unbelievably awful as he was, and despite being an instrumental force in the Mets second consecutive choke (and the first, too, but that’s neither here nor there), his ERA still went down from his starter numbers. Yet he wants to leave the bullpen???

Why is this a debate? Trade him already! We need another starter or two, but it ain’t Heilman. I know it won’t happen, but I’d love for them to get Sabathia. Can you imagine if our Numbers 1 and 2 starters were him and Santana? There would be no way the Mets could blow it then!*

*Of course, the Mets have proven that they can ALWAYS blow it. And even if they do make the smart call and trade Heilman to another team, with our luck he’ll probably end up turning things around and becoming the greatest starting pitcher in history.

(James, I know the whole reason you fixed my site was for more Buffy-related posts, so here you are!)

Well, I finally finished the first season of Buffy’s spin-off show, Angel. Overall I enjoyed the show, and it was nice to get to spend more time with the brooding vampire with a soul. Aw hell, who am I kidding, I really just was happy to see Cordelia again. I mean, what a fox!

I dug the character of Doyle, but I felt that his arc seemed sort of rushed considering his early demise. Without knowing the story behind the scenes, it seemed to me like he might have been replaced with Wesley to have another former Buffy cast-member around. Is that true? I have nothing against Wesley ro anything, I was just sort of sad to see ol’ Doyle go.

The show definitely had some great moments - Doyle’s death was extremely shocking, and I Will Remember You did a great job at teasing a happily-ever-after for Buffy and Angel. The story of an underground demon fighting club was also fun, and the episodes with Faith did a nice job at restoring the character’s humanity. I also like Kate as a cop who has learned a lot about herself, her family, and the things that live in her world. I’m hoping she and Angel can get past their feuding and move on to some loving, but only the kind that makes Angel a little bit sort of glad, and not totally happy.

There were some weaker parts of the show as well, though. Cordelia becoming pregnant with seven demon babies sort of made me roll my eyes (and make me even more jealous of Ken Marino). And the doctor who could remove his body parts for fun was also far more hokey than it was scary. And the lonely celebrity story was a huge cliché, and the way that Angelus was brought back felt forced and sort of stupid. I really hope the show doesn’t have him go back and forth regularly between good and evil, because it takes away from the whole redemption aspect of who Angel is.

I think my biggest complaint with the show though was that it lacked a season-specific “Big Bad” like Buffy had. Granted, I’m not saying I want this show to be a Buffy clone, but that was a nice feature (that many other shows have employed as well) that give the season a wider purpose. Wolfram and Hart, chock full of evil lawyers you just love to hate, were certainly menacing, but they seemed like more of a recurring annoyance than a mortal enemy. But there was a nice set-up of things to come with bringing Darla back, and I think the show has a lot of potential to grown in the next four seasons.

A week after a bad waiter first postponed seeing this movie, and after a cold bug postponed seeing Quantum of Solace, the missus and I finally caught the latest Kevin Smith flick. I was down for this movie pretty early on since it combined Kevin Smith, Seth Rogen and some other Apatow players, Elizabeth Banks, and a story about porn. I mean, what more could a fella want, right?

The movie ended up being funny, but I can’t help but thinking it was less than the sum of all of its awesome parts. Rogen was funny, Banks is great as always, but neither of them felt like they were delivering their strongest performances. The supporting cast was also good (Brandon “Superman” Routh and Craig “Daryl from The Office” Robinson were my personal favorites), but it felt like they weren’t as great as your typical Apatow or Smith secondary characters.

I think the main problem with this movie was that the Kevin Smith-esque sex-obsessed dialogue didn’t quite fit with the Judd Apatow-esque stories with heart felt like two separate entities. Which is a shame, because had the two blended better, I think the movie would have been much stronger. I remember reading an interview with Seth Rogen where he said that the style he was more used to, working within the Apatow-style, involves a lot of improv, which is different from the long monologues that Kevin Smith is famous for. The styles are different, and both work fine on their own, but they just didn’t gel right together. Smith loves to be dirty, and this movie’s over-the-top crassness didn’t bother me, but I also couldn’t help but feel that some of the material was just trying too hard to push the envelope, instead of allowing it to happen naturally. And the Apatow movies are known for having love stories that feel incredibly real and genuine, but the Zack and Miri romance just felt hokey and predictable.

And though it is no fault of the movie, I also couldn’t help but feel that a lot of the funniest things in the movie were already spoiled by advance commercials and trailers. It always sucks when that happens, but for a really rich comedy, you’d think there would be more stuff that wouldn’t make the commercials, especially considering how raunchy some of the material was.

All in all, the movie had its share of fun and funny moments, but I was still let down considering all of the potential it seemed to have going in.

Site fixed. Bill is in the mail.

To all faithful alannoah.com readers (all five of you): We are currently experienciencing some technical issues, as you have no doubt noticed.  Our crack team of web designers (James) is hard at work on the issue. (Please, James!)

Stand by…

How will the Oceanic 6 get back to the Island?  What happened to the people on the Island?  Where is the Island?  When is the Island?  What is the Island?  There’s no guarantee that all of our lingering questions will be answered, but watching this video has me instantly salivating for more.  (OK, so I’m obsessed, what’s your point?)